last night while i was sitting at the balcony upstairs, i looked up at the sky and a different feeling came over me. the sky looked absolutely beautiful - as if the colours of the sky and the clouds were arranged in such a way to intensify the magnificence of nature. and then i saw a whole flight of birds suddenly fly across the sky. i expected myself to experience some epiphany right there because that's always what happens in movies. but hell no. all i remembered myself thinking was "i bet it's gonna rain tonight".
so many things have been going on in the world. right after the tibet unrest and olympics drama, cyclone nargis in myanmar, and now the earthquake in china. i should be really counting my blessings and feeling for the victims of the natural phenomenons, but again hell no. all i do is think about me, myself and i. how seemingly sad it is and whatnot. i know it's human nature to put one's self first, but i think i am absolutely one of the most disgustingly selfish person ever. all i do is think how my life is so fucked up. it's just me me me me me. this reeks of fish. and my pay is coming in tomorrow, i should be donating about a hundred dollars to the victims in myanmar (that thought actually crossed my mind) but it gets thrown aside with the contemplation of which designer bag is up on my list.
absolutely disgusting. the world is full of scums.